The Uselessness of Me

Time have past very fast since I started to work in Wesley Methodist Church Office.
It have been 5 years and 5 month now. I found out that myself is not suitable to work in this office anymore, I found out that I have use to them anymore. I also found out that my standard have just reach to a status that I feel myself useless. Feel more and more free time and less and lesser task for me to take up. I also found out that myself cannot be trusted by anyone in The Wesley Methodist Church Taiping.

I’m such as useless such as hopeless. Maybe should I get out of this church. But my God say I should stay back until I finish up my study and get my license to preach. I don’t know what is gonna happen to me. I feel so bad day after day I have to wear a mask to face all of my church members and my pastor.

I don’t know what have happen but what I know is that my life is such a mess now. I really wish that GOD would send me away. Maybe to another town? Or another place? Or just take me away. I don’t know.

I really have to seek God to know the answer. I really have to quiet down myself and my heart to hear for God whisper. No matter how hard I have to face my church member I have to endure it.

LORD JESUS HELP ME TO FACE THIS POLISHING FROM YOU, MY LORD, MY LORD I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP, THANK YOU LORD FOR ALWAYS BE BY MY SIDE EVEN I FALL AND FALL, THANK YOU LORD JESUS I PRAY AMAN!

For now I just look upon God for help and advice and also teaching. I know is a mad thing for some of you all but to me is the only way.
Thank you Lord for now forsaken me.
I only have you Lord Jesus now. No other person anymore.

That all for now. Please keep me in prayer as I battle with my sinful self.

See you all next time.

Bye love you all.